If you make a decision of getting married or marrying, nothing and nobody should separate you two. So many people have separated and have not solved or even wished to solve their differences. This is because some have moved on while some have been married again. Others have married again while others have decided to live alone as they tried to fight for what they believed in when they got into the union and it did not yield any fruits. Some didn’t fight for it or they gave up along the way. All in all, life has to continue but the problem is the person you once believed in is not dead so sometime you will end up meeting him/her from time to time. If the marriage is beyond repair don’t let it break you and make you forget who you are. That’s why I want us to talk about how to rebuild your life after divorce.
Avoid sex with your ex.
After the war, you may feel wasted and you may feel like the gender from which the person that did hurt you is all the same. Sometimes because your ex is alive you will end up meeting may be to try and patch things up, or sometime you might remember something you forgot there and you need it. Because of the feelings, you both had and the distance that has been between you two, when you see each other what comes first in mind is intimacy. If you have made up your mind that you don’t want him/her again then do avoid getting intimate with your ex completely. This is because the act of getting intimate again will just hurt you and cause you lots of pain all over again. If you really have to meet then do try and meet him/her in public places.
Divorce might even cost you your health and people are different and how people deal with situations is so different. Some will feel nothing; some will hurt for days while others will hurt for the longest time. iI you are unable to deal with these turn of events in your life then I strongly advise you to make time to visit a counselor for professional counseling so that you can know how to deal with the divorce and make your life be lively and fruitful again.
Go for the holidays.
You don’t have to punish yourself because it happened. You should not do what you are not used to doing. Avoiding holidays will make you go through hell and will not help you. Instead, it will only remind you of what you are missing. You will start questioning your decisions and you might end up making a mistake of getting back to what you believe that it’s not worth. Never ever miss a holiday instead of whet for more.
Stay away from romantic movies
If you love watching movies, avoid romantic movies as they will mislead you to what one day you will regret. It might make you end up moving on while you have not completely healed for you to feel complete or worthy. You can even end up in what you terminated and what you believed was not healthy. Instead of romantic, movies go for inspiration movies.
Find new hobbies
When you both met, you were different and all you did was to fit on each other’s shoes. Welcoming some things that you did not believe in, you changed your hobbies or you made his/her hobbies your hobbies. Following those hobbies that you used to do and enjoy together now will not make things better for you. If anything, you will no longer tend to enjoy them but instead, they will keep on reminding you of what you left behind. Instead, look for new hobbies and forget and avoid others.
Find a new apartment.
When you parted you decided who to leave the house and who to stay or he/she left leaving you there. The house is full of memories and this will always haunt you for you have decided to move on with your life without him/her. You should move and look for a new apartment and if possible change households.
Get over the Anger.
You don’t have to be mad at yourself because it happened instead look on the positive side of it. Getting mad over it will hold you captive and it will make you a victim of experience making it hard for you to move on. It is a choice you made and if you didn’t choose then circumstances forced you to it. You have to deal with your anger so that you can be in a position to forgive and forget and make your life a great one again.
How to talk to your friends
The way you used to talk to your friends there before and the way you do it now is supposed to be so different. It should communicate to them that you don’t want to talk about what happened and you too should not discuss with them about their love life as this will make you feel as if you are not worth living and make you rush into decisions that will hurt you later.
Make new friends.
We make friends and keep them as what we need in life are people who we can walk along together and you both introduced each other to most or some of your friends. Now that things have fallen apart, some of your friends are aware and will want to know what exactly happened which will always remind you of your past making your life a mess again. You can’t make it alone and you need friends too but you have to do away with some of your old friends, if not all, and have new ones who don’t know so much about you.
Divorce is not the end of your life and it should not make you feel different. Embrace your decision and make sure you don’t rag behind. Move on and never turn back as turning back is what initiates a downfall.